Monday, August 17, 2015

Flash! Breaking News coming from The Onion ... Biden Offers Government Post To Elvira, Mistress Of The Dark

Frankly I'm not really absolutely sure that this information is factually accurate, however it unquestionably appears to sound right, and would like to know your thoughts about it. This is what they announced ... 


WASHINGTON-Calling the late-night horror film host well-suited for the job “and then some,” Vice President Joe Biden offered Elvira, Mistress of the Dark, an entry-level position within the U.S. Office of Personnel Management, White House sources confirmed Thursday.

Biden, who first saw the buxom temptress in a tight, revealing black dress on a Los Angeles television station in 1982, said he immediately “got rock hard” and realized Elvira had the necessary assets to go “real far,” and made it his personal mission to find the Mistress of the Dark a plum position in D.C.

“Elvira’s hot to trot, so as soon as I was clued in to something opening up over at OPM, I got my main man [Inspector General Patrick E.] McFarland on the horn and called in a favor,” said Biden, explaining that McFarland owed him ...

full article here




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